A Colossal Blunder: Houston Texans, Meet Sam Bowie

A Colossal Blunder: Houston Texans, Meet Sam Bowie
Coby DuBose

8:00 AM

With the first overall pick in the 2006 NFL draft, the Houston Texans select...Sam Bowie? Wait a second, isn’t that the guy that Portland chose over Michael Jordan? Oh yeah.

On Friday, ESPN.com reported that the Houston Texans had reached a deal, in principle, with N.C. State defensive end Mario Williams. While Williams is a nice player, and probably has many pro bowls ahead of him at the defensive end position, he’s not Reggie Bush. Mario Williams is a once in a draft type of talent, while Bush is a once in a generation type of guy. Simply put, the Texans gaffed badly on this one. Reportedly, the team had trouble reaching a financial agreement with Bush. Hey Texans, draft him now, sign him later. Instead, the Texans have destroyed mock drafts like a March Saturday beats up office pools.

Word out of New Orleans says that Saints’ front office personnel are planning to send a Bush-sized thank you card to Houston following Saturday’s proceedings. They unexpectedly unwrapped a bar of chocolate and found the golden ticket. “Oh My, Charlie!” Come to think of it, Reggie Bush is exactly what New Orleans needs. He will come and make an impact immediately, energizing the community and fan base. In ten years, when Bush is living out those comparisons to Sanders and Sayers, Texans front office executives may only receive air time for their Titanic sized flub up.

Like in the 1990s classic, Dumb and Dumber, a busload full of scantily clad Hawaiian Tropic girls came to Houston, asking them to draft Bush, the preverbal oil to their tanned skin. Like in the movie, the Texans’ front office sent them down the road, happily explaining that there were a couple lucky GMs in the town right ahead. Don’t be surprised if the Texans are still picking first in 2015, and are shaking their heads saying, “One day, Harry, we’ll get our chance...”

There’s still time to fix this. All hope is not lost. Maybe I will wake up tomorrow and this will all have been a dream. The Texans will draft their Michael Jordan, and the Saints will be left to fill a Sam Bowie sized need. For the sake of those in Houston, we can only hope that this is the case.